TANcast

Blog2ober
Day 16

As you can see from the title, this blog is a “part 3” so, yuo’re probably going to want to read part 1 and part 2 before you start. For those of you who refuse to read, here’s a brief recap of what’s come so far. This is a script I wrote 18 years ago combining Star Wars and Star Trek. In part 1, Luke, Han, Leia, and the rest of the main Star Wars gang chased space pirates into a time vortex. In part 2, they met up with Kirk, Spock and the crew of the Starship Enterprise. There was a big space battle that re-activated the time portal. As we re-enter the action, Luke’s X Wing has been destroyed, but the Enterprise has safely beamed Luke, Spock, McCoy and Artoo over to the disabled pirate ship to investigate. Meanwhile Han, Leia, Lando and C3P0 wait on the nearby Millennium Falcon. Yeah, it makes marginally more sense if you read the first parts. Let’s get back to the action…

Part 3 Read the rest of this entry »

Blog2ober
Day 15

This is a continuation of yesterday’s blog. It’s part two of my fan script I wrote many years ago combining Star Wars and Star Trek. When we left the story, Luke, Han, Leia, Lando, Chewie, C3P0, and R2D2 were chasing space pirates who had stolen a time machine. The pirates had activated the time machine and created an “energy hole” in space (Did I mention I was a teenager when I wrote this?). Our heroes were following them inside. Let’s see how the story progresses, shall we?

Part 2 Read the rest of this entry »

Blog2ober
Day 14

The following is from a script I wrote as a teenager which I have only recently discovered in my old files. It was my attempt to make a movie combing the Star Wars trilogy (there were no prequels when I wrote this), the original Star Trek crew (there was no J.J. Abrams when I wrote this), and the crew from Star Trek the Next Generation. I only got as far as the first third of the movie…basically setting everything up. I never finished it, nor do I even remember how I was going to end it. But I thought I’d share as far as little Tim Babb got.

I present it to you as I wrote it, which means it’s full of spelling and grammatical errors, it’s in all caps for some reason, and it’s marvelously simplistic. Enjoy!

Part 1

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Blog2ober
Day 13

Another day, another dip into the vault. This time I found a birthday card that two of my friends made for me. It was so awesome, I had to share. First the cover.

And now we open the card for the M. Night Shyamalan-esque twist… Read the rest of this entry »

Blog2ober
Day 12

This is a pretty lame blog BUT I finished editing TANcast and posted it. That’s worth something isn’t it?

No? Well, I’ll see what I can do tomorrow. PLUS Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday I’ll be posting another “treasure” from my digital vault. I wrote the beginning part of a script that combined the original Star Trek cast, the Next Generation Star Trek cast, and the Star Wars cast (the original trilogy, of course). I’m going to split it up into three days so it’s not one big long read like the Star Trek letter.

So look forward to that next week.

This week the boys do some bad sound effects, review some fall TV premiers, and make fun of some old letters that Tim wrote.

[CONTENT WARNING] TANcast features mature language and immature hosts but is NOT a representation of the stand up act of Tim Babb. Listener discretion is advised.

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Blog2ober
Day 11

Someone posted this little beauty on Facebook today…

I had two thoughts. 1) If women taking their clothes off is what it takes to make all women feel better about their body types…that may be the best “win/win” ever. 2) “Real” women are clearly out of my league.

But then I looked in the comments section and the male comments were divided into one of two groups. The first were obvious trolls/douche bags who kept calling the “real” women fat. They are hopeless pieces of crap who should just die already. The second were more “enlightened” guys who said how gross the Victoria Secret woman were because they were too skinny.

My question is, what makes the second group of guys any better than the first? They’re still hating on women based on their body type. They just picked a different body type. Is that what progress is supposed to be? Why can’t we be glad that there are twice as many women in their underwear in that picture than either of the two by themselves? We should just come together as guys and say, “Hey, these women have taken time out from their busy lives to come together and disrobe. We’re passing around a big ‘thank you’ card and we’re all gonna sign it.
…and don’t think you’re gonna do the ‘proud to be the first to sign in your crack’ joke because you can bet I beat you to it.”

Note to Dove: I have issues about my body type thanks to the media (and reality), but I never, NEVER need to see dudes in their underwear. I’m comfortable thinking of myself as less of a man due to my chicken legs and stomach flab. (Sorry ladies, I’m taken)

Blog2ober
Day 10

I dunno how many of you have heard my comedy CD “3 O’clock Parade” (Which is available now on this very website for the low, low price of “whatever you feel like paying for it.”), but I’m about to set the record straight on one of the jokes. So, if you haven’t, listen to the CD before you read this blog. If you don’t have an hour to spare, just listen to track 3 (“How I Met My Wife.”) Reading any further without hearing the joke will spoil said joke for you.

Read the rest of this entry »

Blog2ober
Day 9
UPDATE- This blog should have been titled, “iBroke.” It was the blog that ended up on Day 10 of Blog2ober that should have been titled “What a Jerk.” Oops.

I have fallen further and further down the rabbit hole of my past. I decided to take a break for today and blog about something else.

I miss my iPod. I know, “first world problems,” especially since I have an iPhone, but I miss the huge catalog of music that I had access to so effortlessly every day. I mean it’s nice to have new episodes of my podcasts, but earlier today, I wanted to switch over to music and remembered I couldn’t. Then I wanted to listen to some older podcasts I had saved…couldn’t do that either. It’s amazing how much that tiny little box holds.

But 7 years ago, I didn’t have it. I still listened to CDs…sometimes even TAPES! I’m just amazed at how dependent I’ve become on this little piece of technology. Actually “dependent” isn’t the right word. It’s more like “addicted.”

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve gotta go turn a few tricks to buy a new iPod.

Blog2ober
Day 8

As I continue to dig through old letters I’ve written, I was losing hope that I would find anything else worth sharing. There are a lot of embarrassing letters, but most of them are embarrassing because they’re just so damn dull. It’s like an Andy story only instead of just being too long, it’s also about nothing interesting. As soon as I read, “Wanna know what’s been going on in my life?” I imaging the poor person I sent the letter to screaming, “NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

So I was having a hard time finding another letter worth sharing that wasn’t punishing you folks by asking you to read it. But then I found a letter I sent when I was a freshman in college. It was to my friend, a lady, who was NOT into Star Trek. This was my attempt to change that. Holy crap. (I’ve left most of the spelling/grammar errors in tact, except where it made it hard to understand…well, hardER to understand. You’ll see)

Hey Holly,
How are you? I’m fine, thanks for you concern. I just got my prize for being “Co-Best Male Pop Performance” in the Karaoke contest. My prize was a $10 gift certificate to Chevy’s Mexican Restaurant. Which is great since I HATE MEXICAN FOOD!!! Oh well, that’s life in the big city.

Not starting off strong. Humble bragging about winning a contest and then whining about the prize. Classy. Who wouldn’t want to hear more from this guy?

Well, now that I’m done complaining, I don’t mind telling you that I can not wait to go to Disneyland. This year it will be the first time I’ve gone 4 times in one year. I can’t wait!!! We are going to have so much fun. You’ll see. I can’t wait!!! There’s so much to do, so much to show you, so much to enjoy, so many annoying facts to spew out ever five seconds. I CAN’T WAIT!!!(Did I mention I’m a tad impatient?) It’s gonna be great, if only we can all get there. I don’t know about that. We’ll just have to hope.

As you can see, my obsession with Disneyland is not new. But man, you can really tell that I was a teenager in that paragraph. But, come one! These blog readers were promised Star Trek…

Now, as promised, I will break down the world of Star Trek so that you can enjoy it more thoroughly:

Aw snap…here we go… Read the rest of this entry »