TANcast
It might not be worth it...

TANcast

Chatting with Strangers

March 26th, 2010 . by Tim Babb (TANcast's #1 Host/Editor Fan)

Tim Babb’s March Blog Madness: Day 26

Chatroulette is the site getting all the attention, but unless you’re a guy with a piano, you don’t get much actual chatting done. You see someones face and they disconnect, you a new person’s face and they disconnect, you see a guy wailing on his private parts and they disconnect…(Really penis guy? YOU’RE disconnecting on ME?) That’s why I like Omegle. There’s an option for no cameras so you actually have to have conversations before people can disconnect on you. Conversations like these…

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi!
You: no..I say
You: hello
Stranger: lol ok then…
You: becasue that’s how I roll
Stranger: coool
Stranger: your a guy then?
You: I am
Stranger: :/
You: guys say hello?
Stranger: i dont, but im a woman and before you get any ideas im a lesbian
You: too late I had an idea
Stranger: and that was………?
You: what if you made a griled cheese sandwich with peperoni and motzerella cheese in it
You: then got some pizza sause to dip it
Stranger: ok…..
You: it’d be a grilled pizza sandwich
You:: that’s a good idea
Stranger: riiight, bye!!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Who knew that lesbians hated pizza and/or grilled cheese so much?)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi ask me 5 challenging questions and ill answer it. No ordinary question.
You: Which weighs more: the Empire State Building or the ancient Pyramid of King Cheops?
You: no fair Googling it 😉
Stranger: haha.. mm.. empire state?
You: sure…I have no idea. I just wanted a challenging question for you
Stranger: 4 question left..
You: What is your least favorite smell in the world?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Wow…they couldn’t even make it past question 2. Too bad, because question 3 was, “Why don’t you kill yourself?”)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: HeY
You: howdy stranger
Stranger: I’m fine and u?
You: I’m good
Stranger: From ?
You: California
You: yourself?
Stranger: France
You: Awesome
You: I’ve never been
You: but I’d like to someday
Stranger: Yes it’s a nice country
Stranger: Are you a student?
You: no…I am a stand up comedian
You: are you a student?
Stranger: YEs
Stranger: m/F ?
You: m
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(this is a recurring theme known as “Men are not worth my time”)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hey! I’m a dude
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(See?)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: m/f
You: m
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(The theme is alive and well)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: asl
You: 32/m/usa
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Maybe they disconnected because I’m an American this time…I’ll never know…yes I will…it’s ’cause I’m an old dude)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello
You: hi
Stranger: asld
Stranger: asl*+
You: 32/m/california
Stranger: kool
You: Wow!
Stranger: what
You: The last 5 people disconnected
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Bastard lulled me into a false sense of security with hat “kool.” Damn you! Koooooool!!!)
***********************
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: where r u froM///??
You: California
You: you?
Stranger: france
Stranger: r u a horny girl??
You: nope. I’m a bored guy
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(I guess one IS a poor substitute for the other…even in France)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey, asl? 🙂
You: Balls
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Heh heh…see what I did? I said “balls.” I should try that again)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: balls
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(HA HA!!! Just as fulfilling the second time)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heloooooo
You: hellooooo
You: 😀
Stranger: who are you?
You: I’m Batman
Stranger: hello batman im the joker
You: uh oh
Stranger: WHY SO SERIOUS?
You: don’t take any sleeping pills
You: (too soon?)
Stranger: NO
Stranger: FUNNY AS HELL
Stranger: l
Stranger: o
Stranger: l
Stranger: he died
You: that he did
Stranger: so anyway where is the batman from?
You: Batman is from California
Stranger: hey so is the joker
You: oh snap
Stranger: is it a female batman?
You: nope
You: I put the man in batman
Stranger: KJHNASDKL;GNSIOVNOASVNAS
Stranger: GOOOOOOOBYE
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(I think the Joker had a stroke there at the end. But really, how is he surprised? Why would a girl call herself “Batman?” She would go with “BatGirl” or better yet, “Wonder Woman.”)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger:: im horny!
You: lets fuck
Stranger: m or f?
You: m but if you close your eyes it’s all the same, baby
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Some people are just close minded)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: oh yeah
You: it’s chattin’ time!
Stranger: How are you today?
You: I’m good
You: you?
Stranger: I just saved $43 thanks to TANcast.com
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Ok this bot/turd didn’t really say “TANcast.com” but fuck if I’m going to advertise for him)
***********************
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hey
You: what’s crackin’?
Stranger: nothing nigga
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(How’d they know I was Black? Spooky)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi
Stranger: May your ancestors be struck by a thousand dicks!
You: in the past?
Stranger: hmmm
You: is that a time travel curse?
Stranger: your mother is a man.
You: that is physically impossible
Stranger: My shoe on your head, pig!
Stranger: you are as ugly as a salad.
You: salads are ugly?
You: I think cucumbers are adorable
Stranger: May you be raped by a blind bear in the forest!
You: what kind of blind bear?
You: Grizzly?
You: Brown Bear?
Stranger: My dick in your conscience!
Stranger: I shit on your dead!
You: I don’t think you make sense
Stranger: Oh that sucks. I’ve spent the last three years majoring in English at Stanford…
You: I go to Stanford too!
Stranger: what is your major?
You: Applied Mathematics
Stranger: cool
You: are you on campus now?
Stranger: yeah
You: wanna meet up at PF Changs next door?
Stranger: no
You: That way I can fuck you in your eye socket!!!
You: BOOM!!!!
Stranger: right…
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(I guess this was insult practice for this person…but joke’s on them…I don’t go to Stanford! HA!)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hey hey
Stranger: whatsup faggot
You: you are the one who is the one who is the faggot
Stranger: YES
Stranger: I AM
Stranger: suck my hairy mouth
You: is it hairy INSIDE or just like a beard?
Stranger: i dont have a beard u retard. im a girl.
You: I thought you were a faggot
Stranger: i have herpes
Stranger: and
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Can you call lesbians “fagots?” That was not my understanding. Where is that lesbian who doesn’t like ideas when you need her?)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: male
Stranger: hello
Stranger: you male o female?
You: male
You: I knew you were gonna ask
Stranger: bye bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(At least this dude said “bye bye”)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello i really dont care about ur age and from so… tell me the truth that how old are you and where are you from?
You: 32 old dude from California
Stranger: hey
You: hey
You: how’s that grab ya?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Nobody likes a liar)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Are you a horny girl willing to gave webcam sex or sext with me?
You: yes
Stranger: asl?
You: first send me $20
You: I’m a cyber whore
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Uh oh…my cyber pimp is gonna beat me tonight)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: I’m a 32 year old dude from California…wanna disconnect?
Stranger: yes
You: go for it
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(It’s good to get it over with quickly and move on)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: I’m a 32 year old dude from California…wanna disconnect?
Stranger: m or f?
You: you’re an idiot
Stranger: shut up
Stranger: fuck u
You: well what do YOU think “dude” means?
You: stumped you, huh, moron?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(I’m amazed that person knew how to work a computer much less the internet)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi asl
You: 32/m/USA
You: 3
You: 2
You: 1
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Nailed it!)
***********************

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: PASTA
You: um…garlic bread
Stranger: YOU’RE DOIN’ IT WRONG
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(Anyone know the RIGHT answer here?)
***********************

3 Responses to “Chatting with Strangers”

  1. Joe Anthrax (TANcast's #1 Conservative Fan)No Gravatar Says:

    Reading this immeadiately after coming from Stations of the Cross is about as surreal as the experience just posted about…HILARIOUS!!!

    (The post, not Stations of the Cross…)

  2. DeanNo Gravatar Says:

    1) Dammit, Tim, now I want to experiment on how to make a Grilled Pizza Sandwich
    2) Thanks, Tim, now I know what the “L” in A/S/L stands for
    3) New TANcast blog game: Who’s The Omegle Douche?

  3. GeoffNo Gravatar Says:

    This was absolutely brilliant! I’m still chuckling. You should make this like a series or something. Seriously.

    Also, I imagined you saying “Koooool!!” the way Kirk says “Khaaaannn!!”.

Leave a Reply

You can use these HTML tags in your comments:

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>