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Otomatic for the Jagwire

Posted on January 9th, 2007 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

STOP THE PRESS: I’m thinking about buying an i(ntel)Mac instead of building my own desktop PC from scratch. I also think I may start wearing black turtlenecks with jeans, but it could just be the time of year…


5 Months in GA

Posted on December 18th, 2006 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

Things I have learned in my short time in the South: There is no CJ’s, only Hardee’s. Jack in the Box is a distant dream. By that I mean it is 200 miles away. Don’t even ask about In ‘N Out Burger. Here it’s Edy’s, not Dreyer’s. Apparently the other guy who started the company […]


Done deal

Posted on July 15th, 2006 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

Sorry, ladies, but this hunk of raw manflesh is off the market. From here on in this is a pairs game only. The bacon’s taken. Insert your own mangled metaphor here. What I am driving at is that I am married. No, seriously. Yes, to a girl. No, I didn’t pay her. No, she isn’t […]


Others see problems, I see solutions

Posted on December 25th, 2005 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

This is a “blast from the past” post from time-traveling Andy.  I’ve pre-dated it to a time when I was asleep in a ca. 1973 beater RV in my uncle’s driveway in Chula Vista, CA in order to post about a play I saw a few weeks prior to that with the fiancee’s parents. I […]


From the windows…

Posted on December 18th, 2005 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

Last night I took my fiancee to see Keith Urban at the Shark Tank for her Chrismahanukwanzakah present. He’s on her list, so we had a deal: if she left with him I was allowed to leave with Nicole… We had third row seats, because I am that awesome. We didn’t have first row, because […]


In remembrance of a bygone era…

Posted on November 29th, 2005 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

(Sung to the tune of “Creep” by Radiohead) It was seven years this fall That I lived with this guy. It was no fucking picnic. The smell’d make you cry. People thought we were lovers, But I swear I’m not gay. Just because women hate him, Please… Don’t think I swing that way! So Tim’s […]


Thoughts on my magnificent self

Posted on October 18th, 2005 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

I think I can sum myself up pretty concisely: I liven up all the boring bits and talk over the interesting ones. That is all. Please resume your regularly scheduled masturbation.


The end of the love affair

Posted on August 15th, 2005 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

For the 4th time in about 18 months, a specific Carl’s Jr. franchise has messed up my exceedingly simple order. Each time, I requested a “Western” burger and each time I got a “Standard” burger instead. Four instances may sound insignificant, but it means that between 5% and 10% the time I don’t get what […]


I’m a celebrity

Posted on May 15th, 2005 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

Thanks to KCRA‘s love of “local fluff” slide shows, you can all get in line to meet me now…


Catusha, Bringer of Pizza

Posted on April 8th, 2005 by Andy (TANcast's #1 Ear-Rapist)

I sold my soul to a lovely temptress and the price was pizza, cake, and a “Birthday Girl” tiara for me to wear. All is forgiven. Farewell, holy chonies…


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