When someone gives Jack Bauer a birthday cake, he takes it to a dark room and cuts it slowly to extract information.

On a related note, Survivor has taught me that ladies appearing on the show need to wear sports bras. And maybe leave the house once in a while before appearing on a show that takes place in the outdoors and lasts for 5 weeks. I’m just saying, you know exactly where you are going and for how long…

On a related note, I was skimming through the American Idol “tryouts” episodes looking for Slappy in a Superman costume and I was reminded that lots of people who should never, ever sing never, ever get told so by the people near them. I suspect that this is because the people near them are also tone deaf and thus are not driven away by the awful singing. My theory is that there is a selection bias at work, where the people left nearby won’t inform the singer of their lack of talent because they are actually unable to be aware of it. Everyone who isn’t tone deaf leaves before the song ends.

On a related note, people on Survivor also need to be aware of this bias and not assume they should start singing to their tribemates.