30 Days and 30 Blogs
Day 13

They say you shouldn’t feed the trolls, but “they” don’t have to create content for a blog everyday this month. So before I wrote yesterday’s blog, I tweeted everyone involved to let them know I was going to do so.

Was I hoping that crazy green rage lady would respond? Oh yes. Was I right? Hell yes! And here we go. Note: I’ve decided to just quote her tweets instead of making pictures out of them. It makes this easier to read since she totally “Kevin Smithed” her response by continuing her comment over several tweets. Warning: foul language…again.

There was no Star Wars quote u ass It started bcuz Dick Vader & his bud couldn’t tell the moon from the earth n a picture I wrote what did u think it was an asteroid? Jeez! Dick writes something like “I grow tired of ur ill timed interruptions?”

WTF!? Have not interrupted that sex pervert who fucks blow up dolls & donuts & he contacts his nerd friends 4 a code 69 2 harass me! It was the best fucking bday 4 me yesterday w/all those idiots Blog ur little dick off asshole I don’t give a fuck that’s how it is when ur terminal u don’t give a flying fuck & ur obviously so low on the comedian totem pole NO ONE has heard of you! Now that’s funny! Disney Fan /Dork? I believe that do u play dress up w/Dick Vadar u wear the heels I bet

Okay this is funny enough on it’s own. Look how worked up she got…again! All I said was I was gonna blog about this. I didn’t attack her, call her a name, and I certainly didn’t curse at her. Yet she UNLEASHED
the floodgates of hate (or “Floodhates^TM“) She tries to attack my career, the concept of blogging in general, and even calls me a cross dresser. But did you catch she slips the guilt card in there? Apparently yesterday was her birthday and she’s “terminal.” Wow! This might be your last birthday on the planet and that’s how you chose to spend it? Tweeting naughty words to a Darth Vader Twitter account?

It’s not like she’s an atheist who believes there won’t be accountability for her life. As we learned yesterday, “God is her rock.” So I imagine she plans on meeting him.

CRAZY GREEN LADY: Hello God. So great to finally meet you.

GOD: Hmmmm yeah. I’m looking over your file…can you explain why you got so angry and hostile on your last birthday?

CRAZY GREEN LADY: Oh some guy pretending to be Darth Vader couldn’t tell the difference between a picture of the moon and the Earth. When I pointed that out, he had the nerve to tell me to stop interrupting him, so I called him a pedophile, who has sex with baked goods. blow up dolls, and his own hand.”

GOD: …seems legit.

But here’s where I fell down the rabbit hole of this crazy lady’s brain. I looked at the rest of her tweets today and here’s a rant she went on after going off on me. These tweets were all directed at what I assume is a friend of hers

Hi sweets! Wanted 2 let u know something yesterday was my bday & this ass decided 2 pick a fight w/me he thinks he really is Darth Vadar. Now I’ve met crazies but this guy should b Baker Acted 4 life! Get this, he sends a message 2 his “followers” & he calls 4 a code 69! All his freak friends came 2 play & harass me! Then an idiot said he was going 2 blog the whole.thing BUT he didn’t have all the facts! This is where I got mean & no way do I think this but wanted him 2 go away he was like a Balker (stalker & blogger) so I said blogging not a real job too lazy 2 get 1 so u sit on u4 sofa all day playing cosplay dress up w/Dick Vadar & said I bet u wear the high heels! I have such respect 4 bloggers just not 1’s that disrespect & hurt others disregarding truth! I enjoy all ur blogs & it was important 2 me, n case u read all that went on, didn’t want u 2 have hurt! Have 2 reiterate I adore u & 99.9% of bloggers I had not celebrated my bday since 9-12-2000 it felt disrespectful 2 the victims, survivors & families but sound advice from Twitter friends said life must go on & they would want me 2! The “word wars” was the best birthday present EVER…

Yikes…I stopped before she started giving her friend Kindle book recommendations. That went on for a few more tweets before she decided to go “2 DM.” Can you imagine reading all that in 140 character chunks? I’m so glad we’re not friends.

But look at that part in the middle there, “I have such respect 4 bloggers just not 1’s that disrespect & hurt others disregarding truth!” How did she know from my one tweet that I was going to disrespect her? …I mean I did, but nothing about my tweet would have told her that.

I also feel obliged to point out she describes herself as an “author.” Yikes! even I don’t screw my punctuation, grammar and spelling up THAT much. Here she is talking to another poor friend…

I pray u did not take offense 2 what I was explaining 2 Kelly this jerk is well, I’m not going 2 curse did enuf yesterday haven’t stopped w/the Hail Mary’s since!

If she’s been saying Hail Mary’s ever since her cursing spree (which she clearly hasn’t, judging from the copious tweets on her profile), why was she cursing at us at all? Darth didn’t curse at her. I didn’t curse at her. Okay…Dodger Blue cursed at her, but that was after Green Lady had already opened the Floodhates^TM.

But then I found an exchange on her page that really brought it all home for me.

This is a miserable woman who just doesn’t get things and that’s got to make her angry and confused. You can’t feel anything but pity for a person who has to go through life with no sense of humor or higher reasoning skills.

…but now I want to read her poetry. That must be “awesome.” (Sadly searches for her name on Google, Barns & Noble, and Amazon yielded zero results)